Carolyn Hax is an advice columnist for the Washington Post. On June 22, she posted a question and response about use of a wheelchair from a reader named “Invisible Disability”. (Note: I’ve put the link to the online copy at the end of this post. You may need to be a subscriber to view it.)
“Invisible” was distressed. The pain and weakness symptoms of her (presumably rare) form of
neuropathy make walking painful and exhausting. But she is relatively young (30s), does not
“look” disabled and feels embarrassed to use a wheelchair since she “can” walk. With pain. So,
her response has been to avoid anything that involves walking. And is, as a result, missing out
on life.
Ms. Hax had one response (just use the wheelchair and get on with life) but that is not what
impressed me. I have other “educated” responses (about how we should advise people to deal
with chronic pain). But that is not the point.
The point? 1700 people responded with messages of support. One thousand and seven
hundred people. No, I did not read all of them, but the tone was quite clear. Right or wrong in
her approach to her condition, there are LOTS of people out there who want her to thrive. LOTS of people out there willing to take a few minutes (or longer) to compose helpful, encouraging words.
Clearly, we cannot all rely on Ms. Hax to get us the support we need. It can be difficult to overcome the “mechanics” of linking our distress to the loving (and, if need be, sternly honest)
arms of others. But it is not impossible. The others are there. The task we, and a growing body
of others, have set ourselves is to ensure that more and more “invisibles” reach the others who
can supply that love.
The Link: https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/advice/carolyn-hax-a-less-visible-
disability-is-still-a-disability/2020/06/22/ef2b6dc0-acf0-11ea-a9d9-a81c1a491c52_story.html